Dating more than one guy at once
Dating more than one guy at once - all dating pals
Is there one person whose jokes crack you up more than all the others?
Is one guy or gal a little more thoughtful than the rest?Here are some of the many advantages to going on dates with different people while making a decision about who is the best candidate for commitment.It Speeds up the Process of Meeting the Right Person Some people go on a first date and, wow, the magic and the sparks are there immediately.Going for the maximum adrenaline rush might help you temporarily feel very alive, but is often a set-up to get badly hurt, since you just won’t see the red flags that are staring you in the face.The two best ways to de-intensify a new relationship are not seeing the person (or even having phone or voice mail or email contact) every day, and dating other people.While there is certainly nothing wrong with trying to create a close relationship with one person, in our view this approach falls short in several respects.
First of all, the purpose of dating is to have fun; explore how emotionally and physically safe it is to be with your dating partner; learn as much as you can about this person; and ultimately discover if you are compatible for a long-term relationship (if that is what you desire).
In keeping with the purpose of dating, we advocate a conservative, defensive posture since it is our experience that there are many more people that don’t know how to date in a healthy manner than those that do.
It is dangerous and risky to place yourself in a vulnerable situation until you really know who you are with.
But for others, they have to date someone many times, maybe even over weeks or months, to know whether there’s chemistry in the air—and they may need to date several people before they finally feel that “click.” If you immediately exclude all other guys or gals from the moment you have your first lunch date with someone until his or her annoying laugh causes you to bolt two months later, you may have to go through several mini-relationships in a row before you’re done. Going on dates with a few different good candidates around the same time helps you find out fast who’s wrong, without forcing you to wait and wait and wait to find out who’s right.
It Allows you to Compare and Contrast Life’s dating opportunities can be like a smorgasbord where everything looks pretty good—and like a smorgasbord, seeing all the opportunities out in front of you at once allows you to be selective.
Their reaction to your telling them you’re dating others will reveal some valuable things about their personality and maturity.